The person who has the most impact on your life is you. Without a doubt it’s your mind that can make or break an idea. It’s your attitude that can make you grow and make your business flourish. On the other hand, it can also belittle you and make you a wallflower. Let’s dig into how you can create a better attitude.

Attitude, what is it?

The definition of attitude: is an inward feeling expressed through external behaviour such as body language or the looks on your face.

Can you think of a situation when your body language was showing emotions you wanted to hide? Or can you think of a situation when you could tell someone else wasn’t expressing what they felt?

That’s why your attitude matters. It’s difficult to control because it’s mostly fueled by emotions. 

Where does your attitude come from?

There are a couple of factors that influence your attitude.

  1. Personality – Who you are as a person? Are you an introvert or an extravert? Are you a pessimist or an optimist? Your personality will have an affect on your attitude.
  2. Environment – When you grow up, you don’t have an opinion about the events around you. You are born in a particular culture and environment and that will shape your attitude at first. Later in life, you will have the opportunity to choose who’s around you and where you live. Those choices will shape your attitude as well.
  3. Expressions of others – People who had a dominant parent growing up will understand what this means. Maybe, you had an expressive friend who told you what she thought all the time. If someone repeatedly questions your ability to sing, you start believing you are a terrible singer. The same is true if someone projects on you that you are shy and should stay in the background. It’s more likely you will stay quiet during meetings.
  4. Self-Image – If you have a low self-image, your attitude will reflect that in a way. Perhaps you’ll act distantly, or you will try to cover it up by being overly aggressive. The way you look at yourself is a strong factor in how you behave. 
  5. Growth opportunities – Every time you are exposed to a new experience, a new point of view, you gain a different perspective and it influences your attitude. 
  6. Peers – The 5 people you hang out with the most will have the greatest influence on you. What they say and do will (unconsciously) be copied by you. 
  7. Beliefs – Values and beliefs will affect how you respond or react in different situations. For example, if you believe animals have the same rights as human beings, chances are that you will become very upset with the hunters who kill animals for sport. 
  8. Choices – Every choice you make will influence you. Where do you volunteer? Do you play team sports or individual sports? What movie or program do you watch? What do you read? This will reinforce beliefs and convictions that will be reflected in your attitude.

Which one applies most to you?

What can your attitude do for you?

We all know that a “bad” attitude can take away opportunities in life: the teenager who is cheeky with the teacher to gain a reputation with his peers, might miss out on an opportunity to attend an important competition. Can you see the look on this – normally savvy – teenager’s face when the teacher says that his attitude disqualified him for the competition?

Yet, there is more that attitude can do for you. It’s rather positive.

  1. It shapes your approach to life
    Having this lense through which you look at the world will definitely impact how you see it and how you are going to behave in it.
  2. It shapes your relationships with people
    People will want to spend time with you if you behave in a way they feel comfortable with or admire. 
  3. It shapes how you face challenges
    Having a positive attitude will help you face situations in life from a different perspective. 

Choose right. Choose for an attitude of growth.

I’m sure there are things in life you like to achieve and the path to get there is in front of you. How will you go about it? How will you deal with the choice you have to make, the challenges and setbacks along the way? Make sure you choose right and keep the right attitude.

Steps to have the right attitude?

  1. Take responsibility for your attitude. Don’t make your environment responsible for how you react.
  2. Evaluate your current attitude. Is there something you should change? A belief for example.
  3. Develop a desire to change. As human beings we constantly change, and so does our environment. Be open to change in your attitude as well. You haven’t reached the ultimate level yet.
  4. Change your thoughts. Sometimes it’s time to change a thought that will affect how you react in a certain situation.
  5. Develop good habits. Are you tired all the time and can’t do the work you are supposed to do? Go to bed earlier. 

Longing for a better attitude?

What you say to yourself, your language, is extremely influential on how you think. Therefore, eliminate words such as:

I can’t…
If only…
I doubt…
I don’t think…
I don’t have time…
I’m afraid of…
I don’t believe…
It’s impossible…

These words will limit your thoughts and set you back into a fixed mindset. In a growth mindset there is space for failure but also for triumph. You go in with an open mind and will experience what happens. Positive words will help you slip into that growth mindset. 

I can…
I think…
I dare…
Everything can be figured out…

I’d like to close this blog with a question of reflection. When it comes to attitude I feel reflection is the single most important thing you can do

What needs to change in my attitude in order to reach the next goal I have in mind?